Why I Purged Who I'm Following on Social Media (And Why You Might Want to Too)

If you’re like me you probably get sucked into your phone too often, falling down the rabbit hole of continuously scrolling Instagram and Facebook. But it’s a New Year, new beginnings right? I recently took a good look at who I’m following on my personal and blog Instagram accounts and did some purging… in fact between my accounts I unfollowed thousands (previous to this I had never really unfollowed anyone!) and in doing so it greatly simplified my social media checking routine, spending less time online.

Who I Unfollowed

First, I know I personally feel a little hurt when I realize someone unfollowed me (why don’t they like me??) - but if you’re reading this and I unfollowed you please realize it’s nothing personal at all. Over the many years I’ve had social media I have followed thousands of accounts, but I’ve never actually reevaluated their relevancy to me as time went on and cleaning house was long, long overdue.

Here are some types of accounts that I unfollowed:

Accounts that are “Dead”: As I went through my lists, I found hundreds of accounts that have been “dead” for years… blogs or business accounts that have gone out of business or people that for one reason or another have just stopped updating a particular account. While these accounts aren’t cluttering up my feed, they aren’t doing anything for me either so I unfollowed them.

Accounts that Don’t Reflect Our Current Stage in Life: And then there’s accounts that used to be relevant to me but aren’t anymore… for example years ago when we were first starting our family I followed lots of baby-centric accounts and businesses. However our kids are all past the baby stage now and I just don’t need to know about the newest bottles or baby carriers these days. It’s definitely bittersweet closing the door on that stage in our lives but the practical reasoning is we just don’t need to be up-to-date on baby trends anymore. So any irrelevant accounts to our current place in life were unfollowed too.

Accounts that I was Following “Because Everyone Else Is”: There were plenty of accounts I was following strictly because they were big-name brands/companies or ultra-popular influencers or bloggers. I was mostly following them because I felt like I should be, even though most of their posts were essentially ads and I didn’t find following them enjoyable myself. I’m personally not a huge fan of impersonal/overly-commercialized posts so I unfollowed a lot of these types of accounts too.

Accounts that I Follow in More than One Place: I have both a personal and blog-related Instagram account and realized there were quite a few accounts that I was following in both places… this was kind of redundant as I was often seeing the same posts twice. I really didn’t want or need to see the same things over and over so I would decide where made the most sense for me to follow an account and would then unfollow it from my other account.

Accounts that Bring Me Down: Do what’s best for your mental health and your self esteem! Are there accounts that you follow that are too pessimistic? Or too perfect and it makes you devalue yourself subconsciously? Get rid of them. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life - only follow accounts that raise you up or inspire you in a positive way.

Accounts that I Don’t Enjoy: As I went through my lists of who I’m following I realized something - I honestly don’t enjoy fashion bloggers (no offense to any fashion bloggers out there!). As much as I love a good outfit inspiration I am not into “fast fashion” and I’m not someone who constantly buys clothes or the latest styles. I actually think it’s really bad for the environment to constantly consume clothing and accessories that will only be worn a few times (and a lot of these influencers will only wear items for a post or two then get rid of them). Fast fashion isn’t something I condone or enjoy so I won’t passively support it by following all those influencers.

Important Note: Don’t Try to Purge in One Day!

I made this mistake myself… when I first decided to clean house I stayed up really late one night and was determined to work my way through my list and clean it out in one go - but then Instagram blocked my account for 24 hours. If you do too much of one action in a short amount of time (like unfollowing other accounts), Instagram will flag your account as spam and lock you out temporarily… and apparently if you keep it up they will keep locking you out for longer each time, potentially banning you permanently (so scary!). Getting locked out for 24 hours was very frustrating, but it made me realize I have to tread lightly moving forward. When you’re purging, make sure to never unfollow more than a few accounts at a time and make sure to continue to use Instagram as you normally would (liking, commenting, engaging with others like usual). Purging your feed will be a work-in-progress for a while and will take time.

Who I Muted

Did you know you can “mute” accounts too? That way they don’t show up in your feed but you’re still following them. There were some accounts that I was following that I still wanted to follow to show some support, but were totally cluttering up my feed and driving me nuts… for example maybe you have an old school friend who has taken an endeavor into MLM sales. As much as you might love this friend and want to support her, you don’t want to see ten posts a day on essential oils, or fake nails, or eyelash serum or whatever it is that she’s constantly pushing. You’ll still show as a follower to her and it would be good idea to make a note to occasionally hop on over to her account to engage in a post here and there - but it’s not going to constantly fill your feed with stuff you’re not interested in anymore.

Turn Notifications OFF

If you haven’t already, it’s also a great idea to turn off Notifications Off across all your platforms. Seeing those little “dings” constantly come up when friends post, like, or comment can be overwhelming and drag you into checking your phone every few minutes. If you turn these off you’ll be less tempted to constantly check your phone - and make a point to only check it at certain times during the day. I have already had my notifications turned off for years now (it’s something I made a point to do a long time ago), and I will continue to keep them off.

Why My Social Media Experience is Better and More Efficient Now

After you’ve made sufficient progress purging who you’re following, you’ll notice that your feed is full of things that you actually want to see - no more “junk” that you used to waste time scrolling past everyday. Your feed will be full of accounts that you find positive, intentional, and inspiring - not to mention following less accounts will make it quicker and easier to catch up on recent posts every day.

And another positive side effect of my purge? It seems to have reset the algorithm for what I typically see in my feed. There were a lot of accounts I was following that I honestly had totally forgotten about because I hadn’t seen any posts by them in my feed FOR YEARS. But as I made progress purging who I was following I started to see those long-lost-to-me accounts in my feed again and it was so refreshing! I was able to re-discover a lot of accounts that I used to love following and it’s wonderful to finally see their posts again in my feed and reconnect with them. (And if you rediscover an account you want to see in your feed again, make sure to like and engage in their posts so Instagram will learn to continue to show them.)

Going Forward

Going forward this is something I definitely want to keep up with. I had neglected reevaluating who I was following for years and since I had let it get out of hand it took weeks for me to slowly purge since I had so much catching up to do. From now on this is something I’ll plan on revisiting at least once a year (I even put a reminder in my calendar for next January as part of my New Year’s Resolutions). Your social media feed should be enjoyable and inspiring, and it should be more efficient to check - by actively managing it hopefully you will see an improvement in your social media experience too.

So far I’ve really only tackled Instagram but I am planning on working to purge who I’m following on my other social media accounts too (especially Facebook and Pinterest) for the same reasons.

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Easy Ways We Saved Thousands on Our Dream Wedding

My husband and I have been married for nearly five years now but it seems like our wedding was just yesterday.  We got married before Pinterest was a thing and so it was up to us to figure out all the details on our own.  It was a learning process and we came up with some great ways to cut costs and still have our dream wedding.  | This post contains affiliate links |

From the start we knew exactly where we wanted to get married - a beautiful historic mansion overlooking the lakes and mountains we love (it was also where my husband proposed).  So that helped narrow things down quite a bit.  But the downside?  It was expensive and didn't include much of anything.  In order to have our wedding where we wanted, we had to cut costs in other parts of the budget and in doing so we saved thousands of dollars.  

Tips for Saving Big on Your Dream Wedding

Start planning as early as you can.  We started planning our wedding about 13 months out; we thought we had plenty of time but we were shocked at how many dates were already taken at our venue of choice, how many DJs/photographers were already booked, etc - even more than a year out.  Starting early means you have the most options to choose from and are more likely to find affordable vendors that you like.  Waiting until the last minute can leave you stuck with expensive options or ones you aren't happy with.  

All photos by Steve Holmes Photography

Find a venue that includes a lot.  Okay, so this tip did not really apply to us (our venue included little other than the physical ceremony location, reception hall, and a day-of wedding coordinator).  But many venues include at least something, and some include a lot more than others.  Some items that may be included in the venue cost include:  the wedding cake, toasting champagne, linens, DJ, flowers, cake cutting fee, bar credit, coffee service, hors devours, or even all of the food/catering.  If you can find a nice venue that includes at least some of these items, it can save you big in the long run.  

Pick a venue that's beautiful in itself.  If you can find a venue that looks pretty as-is, you don't have spend a lot (or anything) on decor costs!  An outdoor wedding with a pretty view means you don't need anything for the ceremony.  And a pretty looking old hall with a lot of character means you can get away with little or no decorating for the reception.  We spent almost nothing on decor costs since we felt our ceremony location was so beautiful already. 

Use details of the wedding venue to your advantage.  One of the little touches that people remembered most about our wedding?  The wishing fountain!  Our venue had a beautiful fountain in the middle of the ceremony location and we decided to use this feature as part of our day.  We put out a jar of brand new shiny pennies dated our wedding year (which cost $2 - literally), and put a little note in our wedding program about throwing pennies in the fountain for happy wishes for the bride and groom.  

Don't get married on the weekend.  I know this sounds strange but many locations offer a great discount if you get married on any day other than a Saturday or a Sunday (and some locations offer off-season discounts as well if you get married in the winter).  The date we really wanted for our wedding had already been booked (even though it was over a year out!), and so when were deciding on a new date we chose to have our wedding on a Friday evening.  By having it on a Friday we saved around $750 just on the venue cost!  

Opt for the buffet.  When selecting a caterer (presuming it's not included with your venue), look for ones that also offer a buffet option and compare that price to their "plated meal" price.  Buffets generally cost about 1/3 less than having the meal plated and served to your guests.  We choose the buffet option for our wedding and saved a lot on meal costs!  

Make your own invitations - or at the very least assemble them.  Originally we wanted to design, print, cut, and assemble our invitations ourselves.  But with all the time and stress going into wedding planning on top of regular work, we decided to forgo the stress of designing and sourcing paper/printing services and order our invitations.  We found a beautiful invitation design that fit our theme and colors perfectly and it was all printed on thick, gorgeous paper.  The best part?  It was from a small designer/paper goods company that was priced really reasonably and also had the option of sending all your invitation materials uncut and unassembled for $150 less which was a great savings.  

Don't get sucked into buying "wedding-specific" items.  Next time you're at a bridal shop or craft store, check out wedding day items like guest books and flower girl baskets and you'll be in for some sticker-shock.  I still remember looking at a flower girl basket and not believing it cost over $25!  Because of that we decided to for-go the (ugly in my opinion) while silk flower girl basket and get a basic woven basket at a craft store for $5 and tied a piece of coordinating ribbon to the handle.  We also skipped the traditional guest book and had guests sign the photo mat of one of our favorite engagement pictures - this keepsake is now hanging in our master where we can see and appreciate it every day.  These days with Pinterest the alternative guest book ideas are endless!

Borrow your petticoat.  If your wedding dress calls for a petticoat, see if any of your friends or family has one you could borrow for your wedding.  (If they do, make sure to try it on with your dress before your dress is altered to make sure it will work.)  No one sees the petticoat and it's not a sentimental part of the day, so there's no need to actually buy one.  

Offer to do the leg work.  If you're working with a vendor and have some extra (and very reliable!) hands willing to help on the day of the wedding, offer to do the leg work for the vendors - in exchange for a discounted rate of course.  For example, the cost of our linen rental included delivery and pick-up of the linens but my husband's parents offered to take care of it since they lived nearby.  By having them pick up the linens the day before the wedding, and then drop them back off the day after the wedding it saved us $100.  Also, our florist was about half a mile from the hair dresser where we all were getting our hair done - so, rather than pay the delivery fee for our bouquets my mother-in-law ran over and picked them up for us.  

Take advantage of family and friends' talents.  If you know someone that has a great talent or hobby, feel them out to see if they'd be willing to help you with an aspect of your wedding.  My sister-in-law is super-crafty and an AMAZING baker.  She made our gorgeous custom wedding cake for us and my brother-in-law made the cake base, saving us hundreds of dollars - not to mention it's much more meaningful knowing it's made with love by someone we know.  

Willow Tree Cake Topper (Affiliate Link)

DIY wedding centerpieces.  If you choose flowers for your centerpieces each arrangement can easily cost $80+ and that adds up to a lot, fast.  We decided to make our centerpieces ourselves and save this money.  My husband and I opted for flower-free centerpieces that we could make way ahead of time; we used birch logs with hearts and table numbers carved into them (a nod to when we carved our initials into a tree while dating), along with river rocks and some other natural elements.  Everything we choose for our centerpieces meant something to us which made our them very personal.  In order to make them we only had to purchase the candles and some river rocks - for all 10 centerpieces it cost us about $35.  
(My only other piece of advice for making your own centerpieces would be to bring it to your venue and see it on one of their tables ahead of time, if possible.  Our centerpieces looked awesome on our kitchen table and we thought they were the perfect size, but once they were set up at the venue we realized they didn't fill in the center of the tables quite enough and we should have brought some smaller elements to fill in around it.)  

Simplify the bouquet.  Florists charge more for having to source out more flowers.. if you have mixed bouquets they can cost a lot more than a bouquet the same size that contains just one type of flower.  We wanted to keep it simple anyways and decided to stick with straight yellow roses for all the bouquets and that saved us a lot of money in itself.  

Borrow a fun car instead of renting a limo.  We had the advantage of having our ceremony and reception at the same location, so we didn't need to transport the wedding party from one place to another.  Even still, we wanted a fun "getaway" car to leave in at the end of the night.  Luckily for us, our family is into restoring cars as a hobby and we got to use a '66 Chevelle that we all helped fix up - definitely made it more fun and more meaningful than using a limo service.  

The One Thing Worth Splurging On

A great photographer.  Seriously folks, hire a great photographer and you won't regret it!!  Your wedding photos will be what you look back on to remember the details of your day, and it's so important to have ones you're proud of and that truly capture all the magic.  A great photographer can also do wonders with what they have - even if you don't have the most ideal backdrop for a photo they can make it look amazing with some artful focus or composition.  

When hiring a photographer make sure to look at their full portfolio; see if you like their style, if they're consistent with editing techniques, if the overall mood of the photos fits your personal taste.  It's also a good idea to hire a photographer that comes with an assistant photographer - this way you get double the photos and more angles of the ceremony.  It also allows the photographers to be in two places at once, especially helpful for taking getting-ready photos.  

You also want to find a photographer that gives you full rights to your photos - after all you want to be able to print as many copies as you like, make photobooks, send photos to your local newspaper for your announcement, post them on Facebook and other social media, or even possibly submit them to be featured in bridal magazines.  Without a letter stating you have full ownership and publishing rights to your photos you'd be unable to do any of that without going through your photographer every time (and doing so would cost you extra money each time).  

And don't forget to quiz any potential photographer on things that may go awry and how they'd handle it... just in case.  A personal emergency came up and they were unable to photograph your wedding at the last minute?  (They should have some photographer associates of equal or better caliber they can call on to fill in for them at no additional cost to you)  If a camera or lens gets dropped on the big day?  (They should have backup equipment with them as well as extra fully-charged batteries).  A great, experienced photographer should have a game plan for anything that may come up and still get you beautiful photos of the day despite any challenges that may arise.  

Photos from our wedding were featured on New Hampshire Bride Magazine's website, Maggie Sottero's website, in Super Chevy Magazine, and on Love & Lobster.

All photos by Steve Holmes Photography

Disclaimer:  Please note this post shares my opinion and prices and information mentioned are based on our experience of planning our wedding five years ago.  *Prices and packages from vendors that we used may have changed.*  

Support New England Makers on Pinterest

As you probably know already, I love supporting local makers and buisnesses so I thought it was time to make a group board on Pinterest to support New England Made Products.  This board will be a collaboration where New England-based crafters and small buisnesses can share their beautiful goods.  

If you're interested in joining please give me a follow on Pinterest and send a message requesting to join the group board.  

As of right now there's just my items on the board, but I can't wait to get more collaborators and see more beautiful New England-made products on here too!

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Interviews from New England Makers:

Apple Rose Tarts for Valentine's Day, Inspired by Martha Stewart

Perusing Pinterest the other day I came across a pin for these Apple Rose Tarts from Martha Stewart and thought they'd be perfect to make for Valentine's Day!  

Since this adorable idea was from Martha Stewart, I'll lead you there to see the full directions.  However, my one complaint about the article was that it didn't give a lot of specifics, so please read on for my tips and lessons learned.  

Apple Rose Tarts:  Tips + Tricks

• The article suggests buttering and flouring  your muffin tin first, which I did, but I can't stress how important it is to really thoroughly do it.  I thought I had done a good job coating the pan but when it came time to take the tarts out they didn't come out easy and quite a few had some damage.  
• For the pie crust I went the easy route and used a box of classic Jiffy Pie Crust mix and had enough dough to line a 12-cup muffin tin.
• For the apples I used 3 Gala apples.  I didn't have a mandolin and had to hand-cut them.. I definitely think a mandolin would have been a lot easier.  
• Using 3 apples I ended up with enough thin slices to make 6 roses, and enough left over apple pieces to fill the other 6 muffin cups.  (*In summary, 1 apple with make 2 apple roses.. so If you wanted to make 12 apple rose tarts you would need 6 apples)  
• There wasn't any hint at how much sugar and cinnamon to use, so I filled a cereal bowl about halfway with white sugar (brown sugar would have probably tasted better but it would have browned the apple roses) and probably a teaspoon of cinnamon.  When it came time to sprinkle the mixture on the apple slices I was very generous. 
• The apple slices need to be really soft and pliable in order to roll them well.  I had to microwave them until they were soft and steaming in order to roll them without breaking.  
• Once you start rolling the apple slices, don't stop!  Roll them tightly and place right into the prepared muffin pan - make sure it's close by.  
• Let the tarts cool completely before trying to take them out of the tin.  

The Apple Rose Tarts were a big hit!  Hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's Day!  

Check out our other Valentine's posts:  

• Toddler Art Valentines
• DIY Valentine Postcards